Did you forget?

Three things have happened to me recently. I feel like I should vent out my feelings and emotions now because it's not "emotionally healthy" to bottle up your feelings.

I think I have finally managed to build a bridge and get over Jamie. It's about time. That's the only good news so far.

I am afraid that I am losing contact with one of my friends. She's one of closest friends, I've known her as long as I've known Katy - so we've been friends since like, 6th grade or something. Ever since the start of this year, ever since the start of 11th grade, Nareena seems...different. She seems like she wants to be part of the "popular" crowd. She never has time for the rest of us anymore. And even when she does, she still doesn't act like herself. Nareena's constantly acting like someone's about to take her photo and put it in a tabloid or something. It's like, god, you don't have to be on show all the time.

I'm not sure if I want to make an effort to talk to her now. The rest of our friends, they're still making an attempt, but I feel some "frostiness" radiating from Nareena now. Like, there's a giant ice wall between her and us. I really don't know how to explain it. I should really see how it goes now. But at the moment, I feel like I don't want to be friends with her anymore, if she's going to change like that.

Changing...for the better? or for the worse?

I'm really so very hopeless. I'm such an hopeless case. I'm so much of a hopeless case that, I think I'm falling for one of my friends. No. No. It's a guy friend. LOL. xD I think he might be one of the reasons that I'm over Jamie. It's better...and worse in a way.

Why do boys always act different when they're with their friends? Is it because they want to seem "cool"? It's so not cool. Someone should tell them that. I will. He...Nick...I love it when his friends arent around because he's so much better to be with when they're not there. It's not like he's terribly when he's with them, it's just that... Nick always acts totally childish and immature with them. I want to tell him that I like him, but I'm afraid that it'll ruin our friendship.

He's in my homeroom. We also have Chemistry together. So I pretty much see him every single day. Today, he and his friend walked in late to class. I won't lie. My heart actually jumped when I saw him walk into the classroom. But I didn't look at him because I was too busy filing my nails. Not that I wasn't watching him from the corner of my eye. Then I heard Nick approach my table but his friend wanted to sit on some table on the other side of the room because one of their other friends was sitting there. And then they had a small argument over where to sit. Because I was totally listening whilst filing my nails. Nick was like, "No, let's just sit here," (in my head, I was like YES, PLEASE SIT HERE) and his friend was all, "No we're going over there". And then eventually they sat on the other side of the classroom. So I was totally cursing Alex in my head the whole lesson.

oh my. I am so...wicked xD I wish that Alex would suddenly fall ill and be off for the next couple of weeks.

And all I can say -

Annoying Girl - you know who I mean. The one who thinks she's gorgeous and smart and every boy is in love with her. She shouts, "Me, me, me!" and waves her hand in the air whenever the teacher asks a question. She's the most self-righteous person in the room, but she's insecure about appearing too self-righteous, so she giggles a lot and acts stupid to hide her supposed genius. And she's the loudest, messiesr drunk you've ever seen. Without her friends, she'd pass out in a puddle of sick on the bathroom floor or wind up going home with some sleazy older guy. But her friends always seem to take pity on her, and the next day she's bouncier thanever, smiling like nothing happened.

The thing about Annoying Girl is, whether we like it or not, we all have a little bit of her in us. That's why we love to hate her so much. She's our worst nightmare. I mean, how many times have you wanted to wave your hand in the air when you knew the answer, only stopping yourself because you didn't want to look like an idiot? And how many times have you wanted to just sit down in a boy's lap and start kissing him but didn't for fear he's laugh in your face? In a way, Annoying Girl is us, minus the insecurity. She's so fine with herself you want to slap her. But you also secretly wish you could be that obnoxious without any concern for what other people might think.

That massive chunk of text up there, is a quote from Gossip Girl: You're the One That I Want. I was reading the book (awesome btw) when I came across that section up there and I thought how true it was! I mean, this "Annoying Girl" really does sound super annoying. And we all love to hate her. This girl, well, I think that's it's pretty true when Cecily von Ziegesar says that "...whether we like it or not, we all have a little bit of her in us." As I read that part, my immediate response was, "What the heck. No way am I at all like that girl," But then I really thought about it (I mean, really thought about it) and realized that I do have a trace of her in me! The second paragraph of the quote...is true xD for me, anyway. Like, when your teacher asks a question in class, and even though you know the answer perfectly, you don't put your hand up because you don't want to look too smarty-pants and nerdy.

There's a girl in my homeroom who is totally the Annoying Girl. She really does think that all the boys are in love with her because she thinks she's stunning and she always waves her hand in the air whenever the teacher asks a question/for a volunteer. However, she plasters herself in make-up and I can always see gross blusher and foundation that doesn't match her skintone so she always looks orange. So...if she wears this much makeup then...she can't be totally secure about her looks, can she? If she thinks that she's so gorgeous, then she should just go au naturale. So she's just a LOT like the Annoying Girl, and not exactly like her, after all. Ah. I'm deep. LOL xD

Oh I'm a gypsy. Are you coming with me?

SO SO SO! I went to Spain and now I'm back.

It was really hot in Spain. Not as hot as China, of course (ha!), but it was like, over 80 degrees out. (In China, I'm pretty sure that it was over 100). And OMG OMG OMGGG! Can I just say now that Spanish guys are really hot!! haha xD No, I'm deadly serious! Practically every single male that I saw (between the ages of 15 and 25) were quite.. you know, pretty. ;)

My brother and my dad made us all visit the soccer stadium or something in Barcelona. Largest in Europe?? And then brother got a shirt from a stall outside because we were originally going to buy him a FC-Barcelona soccer shirt but then we saw the prices... it was like $200 *O* NO WAY. For a Topshop item, yes, but for something on soccer? no way hose. LOOL xD I'm kidding haha. But it's still expensive. My brother got a David Villa shirt. What number again? 10 or 7? All I can remember is that the guy who was behind the stall was really cute. He looked like Enrique Iglesias ;) and jesus, he had nice eyes ^_^"

It was really nice in Spain, except that most of the people couldn't speak English much and even if they could, it was with a heavy accent or something, so kind of hard to communicate. Had to resort to hand gestures and eye movements. I suppose it's understandable, because it IS a different country so they have a different language. They maybe learn English at school, just like I learn French at school. But I suck at French haha!

I'm falling hard for you

MY NEEDS ~ I HAVE GIRLY NEEDS ^_^"

I really really really REALLY want this coat:

It costs like $200 though! URGHHHHH.... but it's worth it, right? It's a good investment, because I'll be wearing it all winter and fall and spring...



GOTTA PERSUADE MY MOTHER.

Like fire and rain

HAHA ~ so I told my friends about my new haircut and naturally they all wanted to see and were like, OMG WHAT'S IT LIKE. So then I sent them a couple of photos (because I'm vain and cute and all that [haha]).

Nick said that I looked hot. LOL. I was like, whaaat? and then he shrugged and went, "All Chinese girls are hot." By Chinese, I think he meant oriental, but yeah, same diff. Aw! It's nice to have guy friends who make you feel better by complimenting you ^-^. You know how we girls are insecure and paranoid about our looks? Like, "Does this skirt make my butt look big?" and "Is my hair too flat?".

Speaking of skirts, I recently bought this really cute skirt at H&M. It's black and just longer than mid-thigh, and it's got gold buttons down the front. It's kind of high-waisted, I guess. I'll show you guys a photo later.

EDIT: OKAY IT'S LATER~


This isn't me wearing it by the way! It's some other girl that I don't know~ I was searching the Internet for a picture of just the skirt but couldn't find any, so...

URGH. HOW EARLY! See y'all later ;D

But you're the harmony to every song I sing

I'll be needing to show you all my photos from China sometime soon. It's almost been a month since we first set off!! But you know how lazy I am xD

Nothing happened with Jamie.. he's just so confusing, maybe I just let go, once and for all. It's hard to be with someone who can't seem to be able to make up their mind!! Sometimes I just want to smack him on the head and say "What do you want?". Not that I can reach that high, anyway.

Katy told me that she saw him looking at me quite a few times. BUT I WASN'T PAYING ATTENTION! Urgh, I wish that he would look at me when I'm looking at him, and I would look at him when he's looking at me!! What a crazy world, huh?

Oh and there's this other girl who likes him as well. It seems like a lot of girls have their eye on him. WTF. But the biggest WTF is that this girl is only in eight grade. How does she know him?! LOL, but the most important question is... WHO DOES SHE THINK SHE IS? Lol, I'm sucha bitch, aren't I? A possessive one, at that xD I'm sorry! I just need to vent. and let it all out. whoosh. But-but-but-!! I can't believe that this little middle-schooler thinks that she can have my Jamie... ah. What am I taking about? She doesn't have him xD. I don't think he likes her, he's just too nice to show it.

ARGH! Haha xD I'm so crazy!! ^-^" Sorry ~ gomen ne for being such a crazy and possessive beeetch xD

Hm. I wonder what Jamie would have done if I just grabbed him and kissed him. Haha, an even better thought... I wonder how the eight-grader would react if I just suddenly made out with him right in front of her. I am so evil! I have to learn to be nicer xD. It would break her heart, probably. No. She's too young to know what love is, and to have her heart properly broken. I mean, properly. Even I don't know. xD Not that I'm ancient or anything. I'm only, what? 3 years older. Jamie's 3 years older than her... she's too young for him... MEH. xDD

Love and kisses,
XXXXXX

LATEST CHOP!

Soooo.... I haven't updated my blog lately. I guess I just kind of forgot about it and everytime I remembered, I was too lazy to sign in and type a bunch of nonsense and babble xDD

BUT! I've had my hair cut *O*
It was quite long before, and then I had it cut to just past my shoulders before I went to China and now....

(My eyes look weird here :3)

It's.... it feels sooo different! It feels as though my hair is tied back, but it's not (obviously haha. It's too short to be tied back now)

It was like this before:

A great thing about having short hair is that it doesn't take long to wash and blowdry. But a bad thing would be that you get flyaway hairs. I guess hair is "heavy" when it's long so my hair was quite obedient and stayed down, but now.. sometimes, I get the rebels on my head that just decide to stand up. xDD